Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Randomize
