i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
i've created a new STD.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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