Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
