For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize
