mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
my poor anus
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Randomize
