Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Randomize