My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
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