We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
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