dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
are you so shy because you have an std?
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
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