If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I'm at about main and main street
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize
