not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
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