I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
