Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Randomize
