hell yes lets make some ravioli
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
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