went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
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