She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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