Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Randomize
