Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
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I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
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