$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
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