You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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