His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
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