im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
