Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
We're too hungover to prance.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Randomize