so explain again why im purple
no
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Randomize
