THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
