is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
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