How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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