Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
Randomize