okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize
