I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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