Banned from zoo.
Again?
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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