Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
