You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
