Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
