Dude my mom stole all your condoms
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
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