Don't make out with my wife yet
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Randomize
