If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
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