He is an equal opportunity slut.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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