Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
I see more hoeing in ur future
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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