I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize
