Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
