Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
