Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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