Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Randomize
