No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize