piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
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