she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
