All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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