The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
being pregnant is like rehab
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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