his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
